How to Understand Men

Transcript Hi, my name is Jonathon Aslay, I’m a dating and relationship coach for women. I’m the founder of Understand Men Now, real life, real issues, real relationships. I’m also your guy spy into the male mind, and I’m a heart protector for women. So I’m often asked, how did I get started in this? …

Transcript How to break up with a guy. I think it’s important to be crystal clear when it comes to breaking up with anybody, because the worst thing you can do is create false hope. Second, keep it short and sweet. The reality is, if the relationship is going to end the last thing you …

Transcript So, how to reject a guy. Well, let’s face it, nobody likes to be rejected. So, when it comes to rejecting a guy, ask yourself how would you like to be rejected? There’s really no right way to do this, is there? So, I think the first thing is to be gentle when it …

Transcript Is a bad sign that a man over 45 has never been married? Let me just say this. If we buy into the belief that men over 45 are a bad risk, you might be missing out on some of the greatest opportunities out there. There are an abundance of men over 45 who …

Transcript What do men want? Most men get a bad rap that all we want is sex. Yes, it’s true in the early stages of a relationship when we’re out on the hunt, out on the prowl. We are attracted to you physically, so we want to be physical with you and we want regular …

Transcript So why do men lie? Usually, the number one reason why most people lie is fear. Might be fear of hurting your feelings. Might be fear of rejection. Might be the fear or avoidance of confrontation. One of the main reasons why men lie is fear. Now another thing that men do, it’s easier …

Transcript How to read men. Let me help you interpret guy speak. When a guy says something like, ‘I’m not looking for a serious relationship,’ or ‘I’m not ready for a relationship right now,’ chances are this is a guy who’s seeking just a one-night stand. So when it comes to interpreting guys or reading …

Transcript So why do men lose interest? Well, one of the first causes is boredom. The second thing is too much drama. Okay? Guys will lose interest when there’s too much drama in a relationship. So if there is a lot of activity going on with your girlfriends, or maybe your family, and it’s more …

Transcript What do men need? Okay, the $64,000 question. But let me just tell you what’s so important in a long-term relationship and what men truly need is respect, okay. Men need to be respected. They want to feel your acceptance, your trust and you like the way they think. One of the most challenging …

Transcript What do men like? Well, in my book The Relationships Men Commit to and Why, I wrote about what I call the four keys to the kingdom. We need to be fed, we need it to be fun, we need it to be fresh and we need to have regular sex. Let’s face it. …

Transcript How do men think? Well, we don’t think whatsoever. No, I am just kidding. When it comes to understanding men and the way we think, men tend to think more logically and women tend to think more emotionally. So, when you want to connect with a guy and find out what’s going on inside …

Transcript Okay. When it comes to dating men with children, there are a number of things to consider. Personally, I have children, so I’ve been down this road. I can tell you, in the early stages of dating, I was kind of all over the map, when it came to even my custody with my …

Transcript Men who want a relationship and are seriously ready for a long term committed relationship are men who tend to court a girl. They are not looking for the quick lay, they are not looking to get into your pants right away. They are looking to get to know you and spend time with …

Transcript OK, when it comes to blending lives, this is going to be a challenge for most relationships, especially those with children. One of the challenges that happen in a relationship is being able to blend lives. Do your lifestyles match? Can you even see each other, what if you have distance and location that …

Transcript When it comes to dating older men there are some advantages and disadvantages. Some of the advantages are they come to the table with more experience. They might have a really good job by this point so they are financially secure in where there at in there life. Some disadvantages, they are set in …

Transcript None of us are mind readers, okay. But the best way to tell what’s going on in a guy’s mind is his actions match his words. Action-matched words are the best way to determine what’s going on in a guy’s head. So when a guy says he’s going to call you and doesn’t call, …

Transcript Ways guys show they care. First off, they care about what you think. That’s one way that a man those he cares. He’s interested in what you’re thinking and he wants to have a conversation with you. Another way a guy shows he cares is he wants to please you. He wants to make …

Transcript OK, when it comes to comes to understanding guys, as your guys find the male mind, we guys are actually complicated, believe it or not. As much as everyone tells you we’re simple, we’re just basically an On-Off switch, there’s a lot more to guys. And one thing guys don’t like, is to be …

Transcript When it comes to dating divorced men, there are a number of factors you need to consider. How long has he been divorced? Is he just coming out of his marriage? Did he just move out of the house? Or has it been a couple years? If they’re still dealing with the issues of …

Transcript What to wear on a date. It’s all about the image we want to project. What you advertise is whats going to be seen out there. Remember, men are visual creatures. Lets say you dress in something sexy. Chances are you’re going to grab his attention and motivate him to want to approachyou in …

Transcript How to make a guy fall in love with you. First off, I don’t believe in making someone do anything. Okay? But I will tell you about men is, we love the chase. Okay? In my book ‘The Relationships Men Commit to and Why,’ I have a whole chapter devoted to what I call …

Transcript Okay, friends with benefits, good or bad? Well, I guess it depends on what you’re looking for. When it comes to friends with benefits, it can be a fantastic relationship with all the bells and whistles that come with it. You get the friendship and you get the sex. So friends with benefits could …

Transcript When it comes to Valentine’s Day, a gift from the heart always means something to a man. But recognize that men are a little different than women, okay? The kind of gifts that you might be thinking you like, isn’t going to necessarily be the gifts that he might like. So when it comes …

Transcript When it comes to texting and understanding guys, one of the things you need to know first off, it don’t overwhelm. Guys like it simple and when you text too much information, it’s going to turn a guy off. Now I kind of have a rule of thumb that I’ve written about in my …

Transcript Let’s face it, most relationships barely make it past the first day if not the third day, and often times there is this expectation that women are expected to have sex by the third date, okay? So let’s throw that rule out the window for a moment, and recognize that when it comes to …

Transcript When it comes to dating friends, just remember that the best relationships are built on a good friendship. I’ve interviewed hundreds and hundreds of people that have been married for five, 10, 20, if not 30 or 40 years. And the best relationships have been the ones that have started with friendship. And one …

Transcript What do guys look for in a woman? OK. Now, let’s face it, guys are visual creatures, so we’re going to be attracted to your looks. Good health, good hygiene is going to be something attractive, versus those women who are stuck up on their looks. Another thing that guys look for, is confidence …

Transcript Know this one thing let him pursue you especially in the early stages of the relationship. If you’re just started to date or your first few months in let him take the lead. Let him initiate the conversations. Let him call you instead of you chasing him. Men need to have the chase in …

Transcript How do you approach a guy at a bar? First off, if a guy’s at a bar that you’re interested in, take interest in what he’s going. If he’s talking to his friends, just kind of watch what’s going on. If he’s watching the game, start taking interest in the game. Then start moving …

Transcript So how to know if a guy’s flirting with you. A couple things. Again, if he makes eye contact. That’s usually a sign he’s into you. If he’s leaning toward you. But most guys are like big peacocks and they want to show off. So if he’s intelligent, he’s going to talk about something …

Transcript How to get a guy to notice you. First up, guys are visual creatures, OK? So if you’re out in public, dress to impress, okay? Right colors usually get a guy’s attention, okay? Now, again, one of the best ways to get a guy to notice you is a smile. A warm smile always …

Transcript Okay. How to tell if a guy likes you. Chances are if he’s following you, he texts you, you guys are having regular communication, those are good signs that he likes you. He wants to make plans to go out on a date with you. That’s a great sign that a guy is into …

Transcript So we’re going to talk about online dating. When it comes to online dating there’s so many choices to choose from. So, one of the first things is pick a website that’s right for you. There’s activity websites, there’s some romantic websites, there’s websites for different age brackets so first choose the site that’s …

Transcript When it comes to meeting men over 40, first off, just be prepared to meet men anywhere, OK? That’s one of the first things when it comes to attracting a man, is be prepared. OK. Online dating is one of the number one places men over 40 are now going to to attract love …

Transcript What to look for in a guy over forty. How much weight determines how long you are going to have to wait. Some of the advantages are, they come to the table with more experience. They might even have a really good job at this point so they’re financially secure in where they are …

Transcript How to impress a guy on a first date. The best way to impress a guy is be interesting and be interested. Men are attracted to women that are confident, that have a great sense of humor, and intelligence. When you’re having a conversation, be interested in what he’s talking about, and also be …

Transcript How do you hook a guy with body language? OK, first off, again, it starts with the eye contact. OK? Men are visual creatures. When you connect with their eyes you’re going to be reaching deep into their soul. That’s the first thing. Soon as you’re in his space, give him that five second …

Transcript First off, you’ve probably got some built-up anxiety, you’ve got even some expectation, maybe even some fear of rejection. So the first thing you do, when you want to attract your crush, is breathe, because you might be tensed up, and you want to approach this guy. The best way to get his attention …

Transcript The best to tell if a guy’s into you is, is his energy coming towards you or are you trying to pull his energy in? He calls for no reason. He makes plans for dates. He wants to spend time with you. He even talks about the future. He says, ‘What are you doing …